flutter fly

Tue, 07 Jan 2003 17:43:19 GMT

You are
Spiderwebs of obligation
Tentacles of guilt
Finely woven bonds I don't know how to break
Without breaking myself
Your needs
Reach me when I'm fighting just to breathe
And I'll never make the shore
With you on my shoulders
You were
Everything I thought I needed
Before I realized
I couldn't live with need.

I'm sorry!!

Sun, 03 Nov 2002 10:33:24 GMT

I'm the worst dual identity lj'er of all time!! I've been so busy with the packing and the nanowrimo that I haven't read my friends page or posted, or replied to comments in days! I swear to all of you that I will be totally caught up by this time tomorrow!!

Untitled

Wed, 30 Oct 2002 09:49:26 GMT

Wishful thinking it may be
But you looked at me today
A quick glance and your face was flushed
And I looked down and shyly blushed
In that demure and practiced way
I'll use to make you notice me
And hear the words I'll never say
Or sense what I won't let you see

If I find solace in your touch
See fireworks in your smile
Then this flirtation has evolved
Into something too involved
To play with for a little while
Until I start to feel too much
Or if it grows quite out of style
Into more then just a little crush

Infatuation or casual desire
I know that I can't call it more
But temptation is a beguiling stranger
And secrecy lends a sense of danger
To that which I am longing for
However, love seems to inspire
A sense of always needing more
And I can't survive a trial by fire.

Sweet November

Mon, 28 Oct 2002 09:29:57 GMT

November will be a big month for me. In November, I'm changing my life. This 'novel' will be a type of catalyst... I plan to use it to confront every misery I have in life and use the resulting turmoil to fix the things I do not like about me.

I'm going to stop talking and start doing.

Stop planning and start acting.

Stop longing and start dealing with my life, my pain, and my future.

So, come on November, throw everything you have at me, I can handle it. I'm stronger then anyone thinks, I'm better then anyone believes, and only I can overcome myself.

I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts...

Sun, 27 Oct 2002 01:51:43 GMT

I just realized I'm basing my whole novel around one scene...

He asks what brand of cigarettes she smokes, and she makes some smart ass questioning reply and he says "No, I just want to know what you'll taste like when I finally kiss you"

I think he's long distance... maybe they meet through business, or on a conference of some type. But he's just like her, driven, hyper, excessive.. and he's totally wrong for her. Totally. She doesn't need someone like her, she needs the other guy. The other guy... if he were any more laid back, he'd be furniture. I wonder if they'll end up together, because he's local. And it intriuges me that they are all so alive in my head, and yet I don't know how to tell their story.

This oughta be a trip.

And, in other news, I have horrible, wrenching pain in my abd. Damn you Eve.. damn you!!

So, new friends... how are all of you? Life treating you well?

also posted to dreamwords

Wed, 23 Oct 2002 22:45:46 GMT

mother sister daughter wife
who would choose this path in life
i am too much but not enough
never strong and always tough
to please yet i am never pleasing
burning up and always freezing
you want to know but never learn
you want to blaze while i slow burn
on back burners with you in front
bitch whore nagging cunt

Thu, 10 Oct 2002 23:06:31 GMT

Ah, the trials and tribulations of an aspiring amateur poet... nowhere to share, fearful to show your friends and family, due to the high liklihood of pointing and laughter.

The solution? Obviously livejournal. The sweet, blessed, anonymity of the internet.

Bless you Al Gore